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Move-sets, Pokedex entries, evolutionary lines, designs and concepts.


Some things in Pokemon are worth talking about.

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The Bulbasaur line, as do all Gen1 starters, showcases the progress of evolution without getting too complicated.  With no clear real-world inspiration, Venusaur is simply a miscellaneous dinosaur, a rowdy reptile.  Venusaur LOOKS an awful lot like a toad with its long mouth, spaced eyes, and lack of a tail.  However amphibians have no nails, and Venusaur has quite the pointy digits.  And ears.  Take THAT hypothetical Venusaur-is-actually-an-amphibian-debater.

Venusaur's greatly resembles the rafflesia, also known as the "corpse flower".  It is large, red, and stinks of rotting meat.  Venusaur probably reeks, and I suppose this explains it's poison typing.  Stinky boy.

A very pleasing feature of Mega-Venusaur is how jungly its flower looks.  Its just so neat.  Granted, the body could have stood to change a little more, but its teeth are bigger so that's something.

Now you probably noticed that there are two Venusaur images above and are thinking I made a mistake.  I can hardly blame you for not noticing Venusaur's gender variations.  The difference lies in the yellow bulb on Venusaur's flower.  The make variation is on the left, and the female on the right.  This gender difference is lost in Mega-Evolution, both have no bud poking through the flower's center.  An possible oversight.  Or Venusaur briefly defaults to male when Mega-Evolving.  Rapid gender-changes are far from uncommon in nature, bur that's a talk for another day (Maractus, I'm looking at you).

Aside from being a flower toad, many would hesitate to attach one specific creature to Venusaur's concept.  Too bad, I already overthought it.


This good boy right here called a Kannemeyeria, an extinct herbivore from the Triassic period.  If I was pressed to attach Venusaur's origins to a specific dino, it'd be this squat fellow, mostly for the leg structure.  The actual Kannemeyeria was likely beefier than the one shown above, as most animals we only know from fossil records are inaccurately shrink-wrapped to their skeletons, but you can still tell that this is a very good boy right here.

Venusaur on its own has a very solid competitive standing as a bulky Chlorophyll sweeper, but really shines with its Mega.  Gaining Thick Fat gets rid of two weakness and a boost to all stats with the exception of speed.  Throughout the generations Venusaur has been the most consistently reliable starter competitively.  Since the beginning it has been a bulky and good boy capable of running whatever the hell it wants too.


Now you're probably wondering why I have not gone into the ecology relating Venusaur. Its development in the wild, predators, prey, natural dilemmas that they would have to go through in order to survive as a species.  Well, its hard to touch on these things due to the tricky nature of starter's and their place in the natural world of pokemon.

Plain and simple, the incredibly rare nature of starter's implies that they don't exist in the wild at all.  They seem to have numbers that are so small they can only be kept in captivity and given to up-and-coming trainers to "start" them off.  They are only ever seen outside of this in the Friend Safari. which is, again, a controlled environment.

Its entirely possible that Bulbasaur, Charmander, and Squirtle aren't even native to Kanto, and are instead outside species that were brought overseas.


As a closing note, ever wonder what Venusaur looks like with a closed flower?  Wonder no longer my good friend.

Image result for venusaur closed bulb

Wonder no longer.




ho-oh-gs-3.pngImage result for silver gold title screen giflugia-gs-2.png


For simplicity's sake, instead of saying "Lugia and Ho-Oh" when referring to both of them, I will refer to them as The Bozos


The Bozos mark the start of a special tradition for the pokemon series.  Having a big ol exclusive legendary pokemon for each version to slap on the cover.  The term for the legendaries chosen to go on the boxart are fittingly referred to as "box legends", and The Bozos stand out from the rest.  They are dorks.

While Box Legends are a forced encounter in their respective game they usually have some kind of, you know, power.  Or at least a raw mysticism or otherworldly air about them.  They also tend to be tied into the main plot of the game pretty heavily, but The Bozos being the first of their kind are just kind of put into their games with no real significance.  Don't get me wrong, The Bozos are a cool encounter, but there isn't a reason for you to fight them and they lack any kind of "legendary" abilities.  I know what you're thinking, that Ho-Oh can restore life as is hinted at with Suicune Entei and Raikou, but what does it ever do with it?  Bring three dogs back to life?


Its actually funny to think about, but I like to imagine Ho-Oh has literally no control over reviving things.  Just a big ol bird with life-giving dust that falls on stuff sometimes.  I can find no mention as to the reason Ho-Oh revived these three pokemon specifically, its not like they did anything heroic.  They just died in a fire.  A fire which Ho-Oh probably started being a fire bird and all.  Ho-Oh has no confirmed relationship with these dogs after reviving them.  It was speculated that they regarded Ho-Oh as a master of sorts, but this lacks any evidence.



  • Accidentally revived dogs, made magic (has no idea that dogs exist)


Impressive. Ho-Oh's pokedex entry is also just kind of not true.  Every second entry literally just goes "Ho-Oh has wings that are seven colors."  Except they never are.  Not ONCE in ANY adaptation has Ho-Oh been depicted as having rainbow feathers.  Just the regular yellow, green, red, and white.  They never even try.


Ho-Oh is based on the Phoenix, a mythical bird famous for dying in a burst of flame and being born again from the bird-ashes.  This is evidenced by Ho-Oh's obvious resemblance, as well as the fact that Ho-Oh is caught holding an exclusive item know as the Sacred Ash.  The Sacred Ash, when used, revives all fainted members of your party to full which is a clever nod to the inspiration.  Ho-Oh also has the ability Regenerator which restores 1/3 max HP on switching out, another well implemented reference when it comes to the Phoenix.

Unfortunately, an ability that encourages switching out isn't the greatest thing in the world when you are a :Flying: :Fire: type in a meta over-saturated with Stealth Rocks.  Despite this, Ho-Oh still manages to land in Ubers largely due to it having great defenses and a 50% burn chance with Sacred Fire, Ho-Oh's signature move.  That Entei was given as well.  Classy move Entei, stealing a signature move.


Image result for medieval phoenix      ho-oh.png


While Ho-Oh has a solid base for a concept, Lugia leaves me baffled.  What myth is it based on as a counter-part to a Phoenix?  Nothing.  Lugia resembles literally no myth I can find, let alone one as well know as the Phoenix.  OK, so what real animal is it based on?  None.  It resembles literally nothing on planet earth, except for the beluga whale and even then in color alone.

Unlike Ho-Oh who spends most of its time flying around, Lugia prefers to sleep at the bottom of the ocean which is a nice contrast.  As far as I can tell, Lugia has never done anything.  Even in its very own movie, the only noteworthy thing about Lugia is that it apparently has some authority over the legendary birds.  However, much like Ho-Oh's dogs no real connection exists and it probably only intimidates them because its a bigger bird thing.

Also of note, in one episode of the show Lugia was shown to have a child, raising the question of whether or not Lugia is a "true" legendary if it can reproduce.  Obviously how much weight the show's canon has is debatable, but its still interesting.


Luigia's :Flying: :Psychic: typing is a cause for confusion.  It lives underwater and summons storms, so wouldn't it make sense for it to be part Water?  Unfortunately I can't find any reasoning as to why it was denied Water typing.  Lugia is never mentioned to use any vaguely psychic powers (except for in the show using telepathy, but again, dubious canon).

OK so what are its powers?  No source makes this clear, only mentioning that it causes long lasting storms by flapping its wings.  Neat.  This is pretty much all we know about it in game-canon.  I like to think that Lugia doesn't actually summon the storms though.  It could just be that it can tell when storms are coming and is only active during them, leading to the myth.

As an aside, I thought I'd mention that Lugia is the fastest Box Legend at 110 speed.  Those huge hands of theirs sure gets them where they want to be quickly I suppose.


As for what Lugia is, I am completely blown away by all of the things it could be.  You would think it would be obvious whether Lugia is a fish, bird, mammal, or some kind of advanced barnacle but the more I dwell on it the further I am consumed.  It has these HUGE HANDS that make you think its a mammal, but it flies, but it also has the ability Multiscale which in every translation uses the word "scale" so Lugia does have scales.  Then again, Ho-Oh is a bird and they are counter parts so it'd make sense for Lugia to be a bird as well, BUT Lugia has a very reptilian beak.




I now realize what Lugia is based off of.


1jLPErd.png        Image result for goonie yoshi's island

PHEW, mystery solved, that's a load off my mind.


Anyway, these Bozos are one of the very few Box Legends that don't fight each other at any point in any canon.  Seriously I don't even think they've ever interacted.  That's something others might see as a negative thing, but i digress.  These two Bozos are tied for the highest special defense of any flying type (4th highest overall).  They are both good buddies and neither has a clear type advantage over the other.  Its almost as if they were both designed separately and then made the legendaries.

The Bozos feel more like cryptids than actual mythical beings.  Just big rare animals and I genuinely do love them.

The idea that they are equals is further compounded by the fact that, competitively speaking, they are kind of even in terms of usefulness.  Ho-Oh has the great burn odds with Sacred Fire and can really be an omnipresent force with Regenerator barring Stealth rocks but even then Ho-Oh is still bulky enough to hold its own.  Lugia is a defensive MONSTER with Multiscale and roost.  With Whirlwind and Toxic Lugia is a decent counter measure against offensive teams.

Unlike Ho-Oh, Lugia has no held item at all which is an odd imbalance, but at the end of the day they're both giant birds.  I think.


In all seriousness, these guys are lame to the max.  In equal seriousness I love them for it.  Most legendaries, I feel, tend to go a little over the top with their powers and designs whereas The Bozos are really refreshing to look back on.  Good stats, solid designs that instill awe at the first encounter, and no real malevolence behind them.  Yeah, did you notice that?  These guys are SUPER docile when compared to most legendaries who get ready to destroy the world when their mystic orb is stolen from its sacred perch.


When encountered in Silver, Lugia looks super intimidating


Noodle neck dork


And Ho-Oh looks like pretty much like an upset bird


He scream



Their sprites don't get any scarier either;



Funnily enough, if these guys WERE played as serious threats to the world or as super powerful or something I think I would like them less.  Their mellowness and mysticism feels genuine, like they exude a kind of wild and unknown air.  A huge wild animal that you've never seen before that is plain ol big.


World destruction?? No thank you, they would much rather yell at shiny things.

qS9HOZb.png     PFRrwSQ.png




Immediately following Cacnea, Cacturne seems like the most logical next choice.  Its not like I can skip him either, and if I keep going it'll be weird to come back.

Don't take that as a reluctance to talk about this good fellow, far from it!


Cacturne does what several pokemon from Gen3 do, in that it goes from a single typing (grass) to Grass/Dark.  Corphish and Seedot both do the same thing.  I guess Gen3 had a thing for it.

But what about Cacturne makes it worth of the Dark typing, a type usually associated with nefarious doings and bad manners?  Welp, the Dex states that Cacturne is only active at night, remaining completely still during the day as to conserve water.  At night, they roam the desert and look for pokemon exhausted by the days heat.  The Dex DOES specify that it looks for prey, s the pokemon is then eaten.

Cacturne has totally killed people.  That's not even debatable.  It literally follows travelers and bides its time, waiting for them to become too tired too move.  Now, I would imagine someone prepared for a desert (has water) would simply regard them as an ominous nuisance.  But on the other hand, wouldn't a sleeping traveler resemble one that cannot move from exhaustion?  Considering Cacturne is strictly nocturnal, there has probably been a mix up or two regarding this.


While Cacturne's nature seems cruel it really fills in the role of a scavenger.  Of things that aren't dead just yet.

Cacturne, on the surface, can be assumed to be a solitary pokemon but this is not the case.  They sometimes form "rag-tag group" which implies that occasionally two or more can go prowling in the same area, though they do not cooperate or compete for prey.


Image result for saguaro cactus    cacturne.png


While Cacnea appears to based off a a barrel cactus, Cacturne most closely resembles a saguaro cactus.  While these are two different types of cacti, a barrel cactus certainly looks like a "baby" saguaro.

Cacturne's oblong arms match a saguaro's pretty well, though the positioning of the spines is inaccurate, obviously to make the design simpler.  As a result, Cacturne is remarkably less spiky than pretty much any cactus, which brings up an interesting point.  A cacti's spines are actually specialized leaves.  This serves several purposes, one of which being that more compact leaves require less water, and another being that wider leaves burn in harsh sunlight.

Cacturne lacks an important feature that any cactus literally couldn't live without: an extensive root system.

Image result for saguaro root system diagram


Cacti have immensely spread out root systems that allow them to harvest a lot of water when it rains and store it in their trunks for long periods.

This explains Cacturne's need to hunt.  Lacking an expansive root system (or any roots at all) it would appear that the reason Cacturne hunts is for the additional moisture found inside squishy meat-things.  Neat!


Cacturne's blood is made out of sand.  I know there's a lot to digest there, both the fact that Cacturne has blood AND that its made out of sand.  A little jarring but roll with it.

As a result, Cacturne is pretty heavy for its size, weighing in at 170 pounds at only 4 feet tall.  Pretty much all of its weight comes from the sand then.

As far as I can imagine there can only really be 2 biological purposes for sand blood, the first being that should Cacturne get cut and bleed, sand blood would obviously clot faster and as such would lose less water.  The second reason is that sand retains heat well, so Cacturne stays warm during desert nights which are dangerously cold, especially for a mobile plant.

To me, Cacturne has always vaguely resembled some sandbags to me with its blunt limbs, so finding out its full of sand was kind of a relief.


To clarify on a point that I made in "Let's talk about Cacnea", the holes in Cacturne's face are likely based on the nests woodpeckers make in cacti, but this doesn't necessarily mean that Cacturne is inhabited by them.  More likely than not it was simply a stylistic choice.  Or it eats the birds that make holes in its face.  Either way.


Image result for sticky barb


Interestingly, Cacnea and Cacturne are one of the only pokemon that can be found holding a Sticky Barb, the other being Ferroseed and Ferrothorn.  While the two lines are likely unrelated, (or at least separated by countless ages of adaptive evolution) its still interesting to think about.  What are Sticky Barbs?  Seeds?  Pollen?  An additional defensive mechanism?

My personal theory is pollen, because both the Cacnea and Ferroseed lines are actually HURT each turn they hold their Barb.  This drives them to transfer the Barb onto another pokemon (through attacking, as is showcased in the game), who then carry it with them.


As far as competitive viability goes, Cacturne is usually not your best choice.  While it is interesting that Cacturne has equal Attack and Special Attack, (115) its speed and defenses are too lacking to make using Cacturne a safe pick.  With an interesting moveset, Cacturne has access to Seed Bomb, Sucker Punch, Brick Break, and Poison Jab.  At the same time Cacturne gets Energy Ball, Dark Pulse, and Focus Blast.  It doesn't stop there though, Cacturne even gets some pretty stellar status moves such as Destiny Bond, Leech Seed, and Rototiller.

It seems like Cacturne has the complete package, but ultimately its killed by its lackluster Speed stat (55), so it can't use any of the tools it has been graced with.

Its not all sour candy and spoiled milk for Cacturne however.  Sucker Punch is its one saving grace, allowing for one strong hit and/or forcing a switch on a psychic type and hitting the switch-in hard.  Personally, I think that either Sand Rush or Stakeout would give Cacturne a much needed boost, Sand Rush making up for the speed and Stakeout allowing Cacturne to punish switches.


Fortunately the Cacturne line is blessed where it really counts;  they have great shinies!




Loot at em!  Much resembling an actual dried-out cactus, an actual Cacturne of this color would fare poorly, as the lighter pigment would prevent proper photosynthesis (plants are green for a reason).  They would also stick out like a sore thumb at night, which is far from ideal.

Regardless, the shiny manages to be different enough from the original while not being an eyesore.  Something most shinies would kill for (looking at you Crawdaunt).


Cacturne is also in what I call the "Cacti Club" alongside these pokemon


The distinguishing characteristic of the Cacti Club is that the pokemon in it are the only learners of both Needle Arm and Spiky Shield.

In fact, Cacturne was the only learner of Needle Arm until Gen5 came along and Maractus, who has unquestionally needley arms, got in on the action.

You might be thinking Chesnaught totally isn't a cactus to which I say hush, child, though correct this will be covered in another "Talk About".


As a closing note, Cacturne is one of the pokemon to receive a gender difference that ISN'T super obvious like they all are now.  Namely, females have a larger, singular chest triangle.




This is something I well and truly miss from the older days of pokemon, gender differences that were subtle.  Not that there's anything wrong with Jellicent or Pyroar, but I can't help but wish they didn't drop it at Gen4, never to be seen since.

As for Cacturne I simply can't piece together the purpose of the chest triangle, but perhaps there isn't one.  Many species evolve with differences between genders that have no biological necessity, but simply serve to help males and females tell each other apart.  Useful if your species consists entirely of murder cacti that all look the same.

If you can think of a better reason, comment below!


To be fair, Cacturne isn't as needlessly cruel as one would think panning through Dex descriptions, as anything that is so tired and dehydrated to move in the desert is pretty much dead by that point.  Cacturne just comes by and clubs them a few times. 

Our friend the Sandbag-Cactus-Scarecrow is important where it counts: its cool in a doofy way.  OK, so maybe many of you don't see it as doofy, but to me the 4 foot tall vulture cactus has a charm that's hard to capture, explain, or replicate.

One day, Cacturne will be competitively viable.  Until that day comes, you just shimmy on over into the horizon.

cacturne.gifcacturne.gifcacturne.gifcacturne.gifcacturne.gifcacturne.gif cacturne.png cacturne.gifcacturne.gif




Aah, Cacnea.  If you didn't play any of the Gen3 games, you can't be blamed for forgetting this little guy.  Heck, even if you did play Ruby Sapphire or Emerald you can still only find Cacnea in a relatively short (if memorable) area.  Cacnea appears as an Uncommon encounter on Route 111 (easy to remember).  Route 111 is one of my personal favorite routes in all of Pokemon, for a slew of reasons that I'll probably get into in the upcoming "Let's talk about Route 111" but I digress.


As you would expect for a pokemon that lives in a sunless, constantly sand-storming desert, Cacnea has a few interesting adaptations.

As a Grass Type, Cacnea would normally be constantly damaged by the famous Route 111 sandstorm, but the ability Sand Veil (its only natural one) Cacnea is not only made immune to sandstorm damage, but receives an increase to evasion as well.  This ability seems to be given most often to desert dwelling pokemon, and Cacnea is one of two pokemon that gets Sand Veil without already being immune to sandstorm damage, the other being the Helioptile.

Also interesting is that the first time Cacnea (well, Cacturne) can be found OUTSIDE of a sandstorm is in Black 2/White 2, where it has access to its Hidden Ability (Water Absorb) which allows it to focus more on water absorption and less on navigating a sandstorm for prey.  Neat!

Cacnea stays completely motionless most of the time, and uses its flower to attract prey with its sweet smell.  It then attacks by shooting spines from its arms.  This ambush predator strategy seems like it would be most effective on bird and bug type pokemon, as then would be attracted to the smell and sight of the flower, and would be severely hindered by a spine barrage.  But what exactly DOES Cacnea eat?  The pokedex makes no specific mention, and none of the other naturally encountered pokemon on Route 111 seem viable as prey.

  • trapinch.png

Subterranean.  Also, as a carnivore it wouldn't be interested in the flower lure.


  • baltoy.png

Heavily implied by the pokedex to be inorganic.


  • sandshrew.png

Again, carnivorous.  It is also strictly diurnal, and Cacnea is presumably only active at night.


  • anorith.pnglileep.png


Extinct.  Oh yeah.


  • regirock.png


I mean, I'm sure Cacnea would love to try and eat this burly boy.  But have you SEEN how hard it is to encounter??  No thanks



This means that nothing in Cacneas native environment is viable prey.  That can't be right, can it?  Fortunately, I may have come up with a viable solution.

Taillow are small birds that fly great distances in search of warm climates.  I mean, it only stands to reason that some would pass by Route 111, a DESERT, for some sweet sweet warmth.  Additionally, the Emerald pokedex makes specific mention of Taillow becoming significantly weaker if it grows hungry.  To paint a more detailed picture, I'm implying that when Taillow stop by Route 111 when the sandstorm subsides for the warm environment, and the hungry and weak ones try to eat some sweet smelling desert cactus flower.  Cacnea quickly overpowers the weakened bird with spines, grounding it, and presumably digests it over a long period of time.


All sound so far!  But wait.  Why does Cacnea even need to hunt in the first place??  Its a pure grass type, meaning it should only need what a plant does to survive.  The pokedex states that Cacnea can survive without water altogether for 30 days.

HOWEVER, a completely plant pokemon would still need three things in order to survive independent of all other nutrient sources.


  • Oxygen/Carbon Dioxide - check
  • Water - check
  • Sunlight - none


That's right, we forgot that Cacnea lives in an environment that has the sun constantly blocked out by a sandstorm.  This causes there to be a need for nutritional supplement aside from water for Cacnea to survive.

As an aside, it would appear that Cacnea does not simply mimic a regular cactus, but could have completely replaced them as no regular cacti are seen in all of Hoenn.  This is debatable though, as it lacks any substantial evidence.


Cacnea has an interesting biological quirk that the dex seems to like harping on.  That being the fact that Cacneas yellow flower blooms once a year.  That's it.  That is all we are ever told of this mysterious yellow flower.  Now this isn't unusual in and of itself, many real world cacti do the same thing.  The strange part about Cacnea's flower is that there is NOT ONE DEPICTION of it.  In-game, anime, card game, mystery dungeon series, main games, pokemon rangers, or official artwork.  None of them ever show us the flower in bloom.  A darned shame.



Cacnea certainly has a neat-o design, a particularly appealing feature being the face made of holes that evokes a sort of hockey mask.  While charming, it also has a real world inspiration!  Cacti often have homes made inside of them by woodpeckers, which leaves a gaping hole for an entrance to its nest.  Cacti quickly heal over the damage a woodpecker causes with scar tissue, preventing water loss


Image result for cactus holes


Now, am I saying that Cacnea is, in fact, fill to the brim with woodpeckers?  Yes.  Yes I am.  I absolutely am.  A nice round cactus boy filled with woodpeckers.


Cacneas name is an interesting case, as the "CAC" obviously is taken from cactus, but what about the "NEA"?  Where does that come from?

For the answer, we have to look for Cacneas Japanese name, Sabonea.  "Sabo" coming from the Japanese word for cactus and the origin of "nea" is explained.  It comes from their word for debonair.  For those unaware, a debonair is a confident, stylish , and charming individual.

Cacneas name means "Handsome Cactus".  People in the pokemon universe looked at Cacnea and said "Hey, that is one handsome cactus" and once again I find them immensely more relatable then I previously would have thought.


As for competitive presence, Cacnea sure is a fun choice for the Little Cup!  Not necessarily a good one, as it lacks both speed and bulk, but its varied attacking movepool combined with decent offensive stats Cacnea can pull its weight.


At the end of the day, Cacnea is a good spiky boy that eats sparrows and is filled with woodpeckers and has a mystery flower.  What else really matters in life?

I think the world would be a better place and learned from Cacnea.  You keep teetering on into the sunset little buddy.  Keep doing you.





Most evolutionary lines in pokemon are more of a "maturing" process then actual evolution.  With caterpillars becoming butterflies, kittens becoming cats, and fish becoming bigger fish.  Octillery sees this and says (very firmly, but not rudely) that you better get outta here with that weaksauce.


Image result for octillery evolution line


You may be wondering, how could God let this happen?  Well you're in luck, because that's what we're here to talk about.


To start with Remoraid is a simple enough task.  Introduced in Gen2, Remoraid is a remora and a pistol.  For those unfamiliar a remora is the small fish you see clinging to sharks all the time in documentaries and stuff.

The name obviously comes from the word "remora" mixed with "raid", though Remoraid doesn't actually resemble the fish it is based on at all. (more on that later).  With its bottom fin resembling a trigger and its other fins resembling a trigger/handle, Remoraid looks the part of a gun themed fish.  Heck, it even has abilities and a movepool that go really well with the concept!  Hustle decreasing its accuracy and increasing power, and Sniper which is fitting for obvious reasons.  Lock-on, Psybeam, Signal Beam... the list goes on.

The good ol dex also states that Remoraid has impeccable aim even over long distances.  Its design is actually pretty intricate, its fins accurately representing a pistol even going so far as to have a "sight" and "trigger".


Ok, so concept wise Remoraid checks out.  Gun fish.  Has a design, name, abilities, and a moveset that reflect the concept.  Only problem?

Reomraid looks nothing like a Remora.


Image result for remoraremoraid.png


Remoraid lacks the notable head-sucker that a real remora has in exchange for keeping the pistol shape.  Now you might argue that Remoraid isn't ACTUALLY based on a remora, they just wanted to make a fish/gun pun and Remoraid worked, but this clearly isn't the case.


We can clearly see that Remoraid has a link to Mantine, as it hangs around them for protection and to scavenge leftovers.  This is a real life behavior exhibited by remoras to manta rays.


Image result for remora manta ray   mantine.png


Heck, up until Gen4 Mantine didn't have a sprite WITHOUT Remoraid on it.




Apparently, Remoraid is so heavily linked to Mantine that Mantyke ONLY evolves if you have a Remoraid in your party.

Remoraid apparently come DOWNstream to evolve, but how does it get there to begin with?  Octillery doesn't look the type to scale rivers like a salmon, so do Remoraid get up ther?  Do they hitch a ride on another pokemon?  Do ome Remoraid not evolve so they can make the trip upriver to breed, and live off Mantine in the open ocean?  Why evolve into Octillery at all if it plays no part in the reproductive process?  A big ol convoluted mystery.


From all this it seems like Remoraid would have made an alright single evolution with an interesting ecological gimmick.  But it evolves.

Oh boy does it ever evolve.


Octillery is remembered almost solely for its confusing evolutionary line.  We'll get to that, but first let's talk about what Octillery has going for it on its own merits.

As a design Octillery doesn't actually capture the charm of a real-world octopuss such as long independent tentacles or color changing abilities.

You might think that Octillery carries over Remoraids "shooting" theme, and that it launches stuff from its snout to stun prey.  Nope.  Like pretty much everything else, this is ditched with the transition to Octillery.

To elaborate, the dex describes Octillery as an ambush predator, preferring to wait until prey comes close to a rocky crag that it is hidden in.  It then grabs it with its suction cups and bashed them senseless with its rock-hard head.  No sniping for this Octo-Fellow (despite retaining the ability Sniper).  I mean, it launches ink out of its mouth, but only as a defensive tactic or to daze close-range prey.


You might be wondering how exactly Octillery has a hard head.  Cephalopods are kind of known for their lack of bones, so what gives?

Let me tell you about the cuttlebone.  Cuttlefish have a flat, oval shaped inner shell called a cuttlebone.  Its function is to maintain some rigidity throughout a their body.

While obviously not a cuttlefish, a large cuttlebone close to the skin its head would allow Octillery to have the hard noggin that is described.  Octillery actually does resemble a cuttlefish in more ways than one, but if you careto hear about it, leave a comment below.  I'd love to explain it!


Octillery gets a pseudo-exclusive move in Octazooka!  Its a terrible move.  With 65 power, 85% accuracy and a 50% chance to lower the target's accuracy, it is outclassed by almost any other water move.

On the subject, Octillery has absolutely no place in the competitive world.  Being a slow water type with mediocre defenses isn't exactly rare, so it can only be found in the lowest tiers as a solid Trick-Room pokemon.  It gets some decent coverage though, just not not the Special Attack to put them to use.


Octillerys name is an interesting mash-up of "artillery" and "octopus", but the design doesn't really emphasize the connection to weaponry.

You could argue that GameFreak went for subtlety.  If they did it was just a bit too subtle here, with Octillerys vaguely cannon-shaped head not really driving the design home.


I may seem like I'm ragging on Octillery, but I genuinely do like the tube-nosed goober!  Used one in Diamond and Pearl and never noticed anything wrong with it!  But if we had an octopus that evolved into a fish, we'd be more critical of the fish now wouldn't we?

All this pressure on poor Octillery!



remoraid-gs.png  octillery-gs.png


So what exactly is the link between these two?

Well there is a link in that they are both based off of firearms and both prominently feature suction cups.  Could that be it?  Was it that simple?


Not if you ask @The-Hydra.

He has proposed a theory that makes a little too much sense given GameFreaks history of mishandling water pokemon.

The theory is as follows: way back when Gen2 was getting ready to be released, GameFreak noticed a tiny problem.  These had two single-evolution Johto water types found by fishing-




But they still had two more that they wanted to put in the game! - 




And they had to put them in the game!  They were already designed, and besides they probably wanted to introduce a flat 100 new pokemon, not the awkward 98!

And they couldn't give them each their own line of evolutions, as was originally planned!  Then we'd be at 102!

BUT WAIT!  What if we...


remoraid.gif ---LV 25--> octillery.gif


BOSSMAN: "Perfect!"


Designer: "...But they don't even share any colors or design elements-"


BOSSMAN: "Its fine just give them names that link them to a theme!"


Designer: "Will it be obvious enough??  Its 4:00 AM I don't know if we should make this decision right now-"


BOSSMAN: "LOOK KID, I just spent 14 hours in a roomful of nerds trying to decide whether or mot Wobuffets tail should have eyes.  I have a family that's starting to forget what I look like because I had to design 26 letters with eyes on them.  Make it work."



Regardless as to their true origin, both Remoraid and Octillery are solid pokemon in my book, though Remoraid has the better executed concept.

We still love ya both.  You keep doing you.






A personal favorite of mine!  If asked, I would say it is my current favorite pokemon after a lot of thought.  Just why exactly?  Lets talk about that.


As we already know, Corphish are exotic pokemon that were imported to Hoenn as pets and thrived.  Then they evolve into Crawdaunt which the pokedex describes as "extremely hard to raise" and are presumably released, which explains how you can encounter Corphish in the Hoenn.

When Crawdaunt moves into a pond (freshwater) they become desolate and lifeless, and Crawdaunt challenges anything that draws near.  Simply darling.

To be fair, its hard NOT to be a harmful invasive species in Hoenn, I mean look at the freshwater competition Crawdaunt has going-


Not really fair sport


There is a small contradiction in Crawdaunts pokedex entry for Gen4, namely that it says an old Crawdaunt has very scarred claws from years of battle, but also claims that Crawdaunt repeatedly molts its shell.  This would remove whatever scars build up.

So either old Crawdaunt stop molting, or they fight so often even in their old age to keep fresh scars.  I like the latter option.


Now in Gen4, there is no mention as to HOW Crawdaunt makes a pond desolate.  It was assumed that Crawdaunt just ate stuff until everything died, but the Gen5 dex states otherwise.

Apparently Crawdaunt doesn't eat a ponds population, or even bully things to death.  Instead it picks things up and throws them out of the pond.  I'm serious.  Just scoops em right out until all the other pokemon get fed up and leave.

Crawdaunt takes a whole pond for its nest and repels anything that draws near it by (guess what) giving em a nice pinch, and throwing them out.  This behavior isn't exclusive to males, and Crawdaunt instinctively beat each other senseless when two meet.  I guess this makes breeding hard, which explains why Hoenn isn't overrun by sofa-sized lobsters.


Now let's talk physiology, everyone's favorite.  At first it might be tricky to determine where exactly Crawdaunts mouth is-


The blue lines throw you off, as do the several jagged ridges that resemble teeth at the top and bottom.

However, removing them shows us what Crawdaunts actual moth looks like unobstructed-


Yup, its only the little hatch on top of the blue markings.

But why have such confusing face markings?  That's because Crawdaunt is one tricky and smart fellow.

Here;s how Crawdaunt wants opponents and threats to see his mouth-


How scary!  And intimidating!

But that's what Crawdaunt wants being the big bully that he is.



Building off of this intimidation tactic, Crawdaunt goes through a hard-to-notice change when evolving.

Specifically, Corphish has 2 claws and 6 legs, whereas Crawdaunt has 2 claws and 4 legs.

Though Crawdaunt appears to lose legs, they are in fact still present.  Observe-




The back two legs merge together to create a wider, stumpier leg.  This likely serves the purpose of letting Crawdaunt stand taller to better intimidate things on land.  Big mean fellow!!  So smart.

I genuinely don't know why Crawdaunt gains a star when it evolves.  Maybe because it looks taller that way??  Really not sure.


Competitively Crawdaunt is always a fun choice.  It has access to Dragon Dance (for some reason) as well as Adaptability which makes it more of a wallbreaker than an actual sweeper, especially with its sub-par speed stat.


Funnily enough, it was introduced in the same gen as another Dark/Water salt water pokemon Sharpedo, which we'll get into later.  Together, they bully both fresh and salt water, evicting nerds left and right.


Design wise Crawdaunt is a great example of a real life animal given a "pokemon charm" and something about it really speaks to me.




1. Favorite color:  the shadow of smaller things

2. Favorite musical artist/band:  "things that go crunch"

3. Favorite music genre:  bebop, followed by rocksteady

4. Have you ever been in love?:  one day you will know love, for what truly is.  on that day, you will not ask "Have you ever ever been in love?" but instead ask "How much love have you caught and crunched between your big strong claws?".

5. Are you currently in a relationship?:  many parasites

6. Zodiac sign?:  that smarmy wench thought she could just wade her way into the property (TM) and take a bowlful of water to waltz off with.  foolish

7. Do you believe in ghosts?:  ignore ghost??  no, what if there is ghost and it ghosts at you?? BAD factor in possibility of ghost, that is wise.  if wrong, oh well, still ready.  if correct, then tasty ghost snack for efforts and readiness

8. Any tattoos or piercings?:  only a fool-fellow bemarks themselves through any means but GUNCHY COMBAT

9. Would you ever dye your hair?:  eat any hair you come across, an old habit o mine from whelphood.  developed the ol exoskeleton nice and early.  i suggest you pick up this habit

10. What color are your eyes?:  green ones taste best

11. What color is your hair?:  prefer sandy-brown, reminders of mud

12. The last bruise you got - where is it located?:  a hilarious, if offensive notion.  bruises are for those to weak to properly succumb to battle

13. Do you have a favorite pair of shoes?:  live in them

14. A word you have trouble spelling?:  GUNCH.  whenever spelled, trouble follows

15. Celebrity crush?:  crush??  many celeries crushed, not one

16. Green or purple grapes?:  if you offer grapes, take both

17. Do you sleep with your window open?:  openings bad

18. Height?:  squat and surly, beef and burly

19. Are you afraid of spiders?:  tasty

20. Favorite movie?:  School House of Rock (Master's Edition)

21. Favorite T.V. show?:  Scooby

22. If you could announce something to the whole world, what would you say?:  remember you are weak, we are all weak

23. Ever broken a bone?:  taking serious questions only

24. How many concerts have you been to?:  illegal download

25. Play any instruments?:  ?? those are for mealtimes

26. Any internet friends? Who are you closest to?:  the collective

27. Favorite food?:  That Crunchy Stuff (TM)

28. Do you have any allergies?:  potatoes hurt the mouth, but are important food-things anyway

29. Last book you read?:  Hardy Boys Hilarious Tales (Very Tasty Edition)

30. Coffee or tea?:  slormp them up

31. Ever had a song or poem written about you?:  just now

32. Pet peeves?:  many companions, and dead and ate

33. How many languages do you speak?:  mine

34. Ever had a rumor spread about you?:  ask assistant;  under their jurisdiction

35. Define “art”.:  not food/food that tastes bad (no crunch)

36. Can you touch your nose with your tongue?:  someones nose, yes

37. Where is your best friend right now?:  dying for my cause

38. The last song you listened to?:  "Fever The Ghost"

39. Favorite Tumblr blog?:  CrunchyStuffs 

40. Top 5 ____?:  they are all crunch

41. Ever witnessed a crime?:  witness all, but yes mostly crimes

42. Favorite Ice Cream?:  eaty ones

43. Ever been in a physical fight?:  serious questions only

44. Ever glued your hand to something?:  funny story from hatchhood:  ate glue

45. Have you ever been easily amused by something?:  occasional crunchings elicit chuckles

46. Ever forgotten someone’s name?:  my own once at a birthday party

47. One of your bad habits?:  habits are in nature bad, and make up ones very being

48. Are you good at lying?:  proud to claim sleep once every cycle

49. Your favorite smell?:  brine and mud

50. If there was movie based on your life, what would it be called?:  "You Can't Gunch THAT! (Or Can You?)"  a film starring me

51. What makes you nervous?:  stocks.  just what are they??  (have never gunched one, cannot be certain)

52. Idea of a perfect date?:  ideally harvested in april or may.  this is when dates are at their most ripe, but moldy ones come second (love a tasty date)

53. Are you afraid of falling in love?:  a wise fellow fears all things and at the same time does them

54. Do you like the beach?:  heard good things from friend of mine, fear excessive birds

55. What’s something you really want right now?:  plum

56. Last thing you ate?:  plum

57. Sexuality?:  not last i checked

58. Are you a paranoid person?:  yesp

59. Favorite type of food?:  freshly crunched

60. Curly or straight hair?:  again with hair?? it is all tasty, should not matter

61. Favorite month/time of year?:  winter months of sleep

62. Last thing you drank?:  plum

63. If you could say anything to your crush right now, what would it be?:  hor hor i have crushed you

64. Least favorite holiday?:  feasting day

65. Favorite holiday?:  feasting day, 1876

66. Favorite kind of jewelry?:  ??

67. Makeup or no makeup?:  interferes with taste

68. Favorite mythical creature?:  they are all real all of them

69. Do you prefer to be in front of or behind the camera?:  behind to better gunch

70. Favorite type of soda?:  boysenberry

71. Nails painted or not?:  nails tasty, paint tasty in moderation

72. Play any sports?:  bloodsport

73. How many songs are on your current playlist?:  my favorites

74. Favorite kind of Gatorade?:  baja blast

75. What do you think of your handwriting?:  ?? i just tikity tak on the gomputer keyboard

76. Any pets?:  none mine, all eaten

77. What is one thing you wish you could change about yourself?:  more will

78. Day or night?:  only mud here

79. If you had to wear one color for the rest of your life, what would it be?:  a healthy rusty glow

80. What’s your favorite word?:  crunch and gunch in equal measure

81. Least favorite word?:  feasting day

82. What is your opinion on “Blood is thicker than water…”?:  a fact, but blood sure tastes better and is worth thicker swimming

83. Who was the last person to hurt you?:  defeated now

84. Where is the weirdest scar you have and how did you get it?:  gunchy combat, all over the place

85. How many pillows do you sleep with?:  ??

86. Who was the last person you texted and what did it say?:  hor hor i have won this round spearmonger

87. If you could go anywhere in the world right now, where would you go?:  hole

88. Choose one superpower.:  taller, to defeat spearmonger for permanent

89. Soft or firm pillows?:  neither is tasty, will eat anyway

90. What is one thing you constantly worry about?:  spearmonger

91. Dream career?:  retiring

92. Do you ever want to get married?:  never, unsafe.  friend told me so herself

93. Would you want to have kids?:  heard good things from uncle flapcake, that old dog

94. What’s one of your biggest fears?:  feasting day

95. What is the current time?:  only mud here

96. What time did you go to bed last night?:  only mud here

97. Twitter or Tumblr?:  both tasty

98. Dogs or cats?:  both tasty


having tagged myself, i now tag @Crab with afro


godspeed old friend




Image result for pokemon fishermanImage result for sinnoh fishermanRelated image


An strange bunch.  We've all seen them while playing a game for the first time, facing away from you causing you to think they aren't trainers.  However, the most effective predators never even need to chase prey.  Simply lie in wait.

Before you know it, BAM, that stout man you talked to hoping he would have an item turned out to have a full team of Magikarp.

Most of us fell for this trap, but was it really one?  While going through a route's mandatory battles, one is often jarred by the presence of another human being that does not demand immediate combat.  We stopped, wondering, WOULD this man fight us?  Why is he here?  And in so doing we are engaged in yet another battle, but the experience is shifted up and it feels less mundane than just forcing yet another trainer fight.

The psychological effect these trainers have is astounding, and yes, they ARE considered trainers.

And when you replayed the games, you still fought them for experience.  They always win.


Not to say they aren't a threat.

About midway through any given game their average team goes from looking like this:




To this:



Ah.  Well.  It sure was nice the first time this happened.  BAM three Gyarados.


Its pretty much stated that fishermen just use whatever pokemon they caught that day to fight you (with a few exceptions).

It would be really interesting if there was slight RnG when it came to what pokemon they used, like if they just had 3 random fish in the area.  Unfortunately, no region really has a diverse enough amount of fishing exclusive pokemon.


There seems to be far fewer fishermen in S&M, but maybe that's just me imagining things.  Beaches boardwalks and bays all feel a little emptier without their turned-around sentinels.




Corphish is a complete and utter Good Boy.


This impeccable specimen also holds a secret, that being no one actually knows what region Corphish originates from.  Nice try wise-guy, it isn't Hoenn.  Apparently they were imported form "overseas" TO Hoenn where, being the hardy boys they are, they quickly grew in number and now drive pokemon out of ponds and are OK with eating whatever.

The best part is the REASON they were imported to Hoenn in the first place: to be pets.  Yessir, these dog-sized crawdads apparently made great pets. I for one find the people within the pokemon universe suddenly a lot more relatable.

It can only be caught by fishing in the Gen 3 games, which makes sense.  Crawdads aren't exactly "floaty" to put it scientifially, so you'd never see one while using surf.  Despite its apparent common and invasive nature, Corphish is surprisingly not too prevalent of an encounter in Ruby and Sapphire, only appearing on two routes.  Maybe it just hides better in the other ponds.

Strangely enough, the Black and White games, but this time it can ONLY be encountered by surfing.  Fishing won't work.  This is likely for the more mechanical reason that B & W had EXTREMELY few different surfing encounters and Corphish was simply used to round out the numbers.  Here wee already a good varied balance of fishing encounters.


Most hilariously though, is how you encounter it in Diamond and Pearl.  It is found in exactly one body of water.  This one in Celestic Town.

Celestic Town

It isn't cut off by much, its just that small.  Corphish exists solely in this pond in Sinnoh.  Which is hilarious.


Corphish is more than just a charming face.  Having used one I hatched from an egg for an entire playthrough of Platinum (I traded for the egg early game) I can vouch for it's usefulness.  Hyper Cutter is an ok ability in-game.  Corphish doesn't lack decent moves either, learning them at an acceptable pace as you move through the game.  Crawdaunt is also a powerhouse, but he'll get his own "Talk About" don't you worry.  Though funnily enough, despite Crawdaunts constant rage, Corphish is never said to be aggressive in the slightest.


Corphishs name is a weird spot.  The "Cor" could come from "corps" given its apparent populousness, and "phish" simply comes from the fact that it is a crayfish.  His Japanes name means "Bad Habit Army Crayfish."  Beautiful.


Want a fun Corphish fact?  Trick question, all Corphish facts are inherently fun.  Corphish is the ONLY pokemon to date with a capture rate of 205.   Special fellow.


Image result for corphish serebii


Its also pretty great that Corphish has no real way of moving its claws.  The "arm" oh the claws is so short that it can only really hold them in a constantly confrontational pose.  What other pose is needed really?


Corphish lacks the dark-typing of its evolution, largely because while it is still a bitey and rowdy boy, they have not yet delved into full on ne'erdowell territory.  They share the same abilities though, Battle Armor and Hyper Cutter being the regular ones.  While fitting abilities neither is great, but ultimately the dream world ability is WAY better: Adaptability.  Increases STAB, and when combined with a high attack and defense stat as well as some really nice moves (Aqua Jet, Crabhammer, Knock Off, Swords Dance/Dragon Dance) Corphish cleans up pretty nicely in the Little-Cup as a decent wallbreaker.


The largest question left by Corphish is whether or not we will ever get to see its true home?  Maybe its a mystery best left unanswered.




Image result for gorebyss cardImage result for gorebyss cardImage result for gorebyss card


The fact of the matter is Gorebyss is weird and confusing, in all the best ways.  While there is no true one area it stands out in, lets start with the Dex descriptions.


While Gorebyss is the "South-Sea Pokemon", it lives at extreme depths similar to its counter-part evolution Huntail, which is actually the "Deep-Sea Pokemon".  Not sure what exactly the distinction there is.  The Dex also claims that since the body of a Gorebyss is built to withstand such extreme water pressure, that its body can also resist physical attacks.  This is a bit strange as Gorebyss doesn't have high (or even average) defensive stats, and has no abilities that relate to reducing damage.  In addition it had a pretty mediocre HP stat, so I don't know where all this "bulk" that the Dex talks about is hiding.  It wouldn't be weird, but the Dex goes as far as to say "This Pokemons body is unharmed by ordinary attacks", which is just plain ol malarkey.

Gorebyss is also omnivorous which is unexpected.  Apparently the purpose of its proboscis is to reach into gaps between rocks and seaweed.  The other more noteworthy use of its long pink honker is to slip it inside of prey and drain its body fluids.  The exact process is kind of breezed over, minus the fact that the Dex calls it "cruel",so its unknown whether or not Gorebyss violently skewers prey or acts more as a leech and drains fluids while sedating prey.  If I had to speculate though, I would guess that the process is brutal and lethal to the victim, as Gorebyss is 6 feet long and can hold a lot of fluid with its tube-like body.  Additionally the dynamic shape of the fins near the Pokemons head seem to be designed for puncturing, and its oddly shaped body implies strong muscles capable of a corkscrew motion which would assist in attaching to prey.

The last interesting note to be found within the Dex would be that Gorebyss apparently turn a vivid pink whenever they finish eating, and during the Spring they stay pink until Summer.  No other comment is made on this, so we cannot properly infer what exactly this means.  Again, if I absolutely HAD to guess, it sounds like a mating thing.  Am I wrong??  Maybe, but a seasonally brought on vivid change of color seems like an "attract a mate" thing to me.  The vivid coloration after feeding would inform a potential mate that the Gorebyss in question is capable.  It would probably be super hot.  To like another Gorebyss though.  Pure speculation.


With the strange biology of Gorebyss out of the way its time to address the elephant in the room.  You saw it coming.  The evolutionary chain.

Image result for gorebyss evolution chain

The part about Gorebyss that people tend to harp on the most.  Clamperl evolves when given either a Deep-Sea Tooth or a Deep-Sea Scale and is then traded.  How exactly this process could possibly occur in the wild beats me.  Both evolutions can be either male or female, and Huntail and Gorebyss can be bred with their own species. 

While I can't comprehend the method of the evolution, I can take a stab as to WHY a clam can become two eels.  The clam in this case could be a separate being from what is truly Clamperl (the pink ball in the middle) which simply lives off of the clams protection until it matures.

Even if this explanation doesn't satisfy you, there is also the fact that both evolutions of Clamperl could still be mollusks, that have simply shed their shells (in other words, they're the soft stuff inside of a clam).  Regardless I suggest you choose at least one of these explanations regarding evolution or you will be driven mad if you think about it further.


Now I know what you're thinking: "Gee this is all great, but WHY is it called Gorebyss in the first place??  What does that mean??"

Gorebyss is most likely a combination of "gorgeous" and "abyss" all things considered, as does live in the deep-sea.

When I first realized this I was pretty disappointed though.  At first I thought it It was a mix of "GORGE" and abyss, as its Dex descriptions love bringing that detail up, but alas, its just not that likely that was the intention.

One of the few Pokemon where the inspiration for its design plays no real part in the naming.


Speaking of design, it would appear that Gorebyss is based on either a snipe eel or a pipe fish, or some combination of the two.

Its a god contrast as Huntail is undoubtedly based on a gulper eel.

gotta cover all those deep sea eels man.  You gotta


Move wise Gorebyss gets pretty mush what you expect any pink fish Pokemon to get (a bunch of water type support moves) wit hone notable exception.

Shell Smash.

Why Gorebyss retains this move from Clamperl I'll never know, but when combined with the fact that it also gets Baton Pass it can lead to some fun sweeps.  And lost games.  It can lead to those too.  Its just a shame it has two lackluster abilities in Hydration and Swift Swim.  Performs best when wet, like most fish I guess, but it seems like a wasted opportunity.

Also I hope I'm not the only one who realizes that the placement of Gorebyss' "shells" are really unfortunate since it learns Shell Smash.  We're all thinking it.  Just saying it.




Ultimately Gorebyss is a great Pokemon with a lot to talk about.  Though I can't see it swimming as gracefully as the Dex claims with a body in that particular shape with no evident locomotion assisting fins. 

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